Who?
Saturday, March 18, 2006
♥ Saturday, March 18, 2006
You know when you watch those movies which have romantic leads you kinda get those warm and fuzzy feeling all over you and you feel like you want to find a partner who can do what they do in the movies? At least I do.
I mean, yeah sure I'm too young to be thinking about what I'll be doing when I'm actually 25. Will I be living with my 'prince charming' in a lighthouse like the one in 'Yours, Mine, Ours', with exception of having 18(EIGHTEEEEEEN) kids or will I be like in some place somewhere in the world living some life where everyday is about work, work and more work?
WIll I be more like Helen or Frank in that movie? It is most unlikely that I will be living in a lighthouse, of course that is. How about an apartment with a treetop view? Like you know The Lizzie McGuire Movie, the rooftop of the hotel. I like that place. I know I don't have to go all the way to Rome to find him.
I want someone to catch roaches for me. I want someone to do the dishes on odd days while I do even. I want someone who cooks dinner on weekends. I want someone who loves me for who I am and what I do, even those silly dumb mistakes I make sometimes. He'll find them interesting and he'll grow to love the mistakes, and by doing that he is accepting me for me, not accepting me for himself.
He won't just be someone I love but also my best friend. I'll tell him everything that's inside, what I think, my plans, my thoughts, and he will return the favour. Instead of going to the bowling alley on Wednesdays he'll be home reading the paper. Not jumping into fire buildings like Bob in The Incredibles. Not pretending to be going to the bowling alley when he's gonna jump out of a fire building either.
Where will we first meet, when? How? On the beach like Monster-In-Law, while I am walking 7 dogs? How sweet will he be, how thoughtful and considerate he will act towards me? Will he love me? Will we live in a big house or a small apartment? Will he support me when I lack my confidence? Will he hold me up when I don't believe? Will he fix me when I'm messed? Most importantly, will he love me when my heart breaks so much? Will he hold me in his arms when I'm afraid, and let me put my head on his shoulders when I cry?
Will I wait up for him on weekdays when he works OT? Will I be cooking instant noodles while watching and rewatching pride and prejudice like Monica does? Will I cook breakfast every morning, or will he?
I don't know why I'm thinking and writing about all these now, maybe it's because I've seen a lot of those movies in the past week. They all make me think about how I will be like when I'm older. Who will I spend my life with? This question is yet to be answered.
Yet I know that life will not be so perfect. If so, then why do I set such high expectations? Why do I want my life like in the dramas? I want to find someone I really love, a soul mate that knows me inside out, someone who will make me flutter reading his letters, and I will at once recognise his handwriting and his style just by a glance?
Yet again I know true love is hard to find, but I understand that it is stronger than gold, purer than water and it will stay as it is forever. This is the meaning of love.
Why do I even care? I don't think anyone would want to see me in my horrifying hair.
- Why do you act like you dont care when I know you do care about me more than anyone and I know you know me more than anyone. Why dont you dare to tell me. Why dont you dare to be yourself -
Jess
